Welcome to Dear Father Thomas, a weekly column where readers share their questions about faith, family, relationships, and life’s challenges. Each week, Father Thomas offers practical wisdom and spiritual guidance rooted in Scripture and the teachings of the Catholic Church.
DEAR FATHER THOMAS:I haven’t been to church regularly in years. Life happened. I made mistakes I’m not proud of, and somewhere along the way I started believing that everyone else at church was holier than I am. Every time I think about going back, I imagine people judging me or wondering where I’ve been. I don’t know all the prayers anymore. I feel awkward, ashamed, and honestly like I don’t belong there. I miss feeling close to God, but I don’t know if there’s really a place for someone like me anymore. — STANDING OUTSIDE
DEAR STANDING OUTSIDE: Thank you for writing with such honesty. I suspect many people have felt exactly what you’re feeling, even if they’ve never said it aloud. One of the greatest lies we can believe is that the Church is only for people who have everything together. It isn’t. The Church is where sinners encounter the mercy of Christ. Every person in the pews comes carrying weaknesses, struggles, and sins.
You do not have to earn your place before walking through the church doors. Christ is the One who invites you. He did not wait until people were perfect before calling them to follow Him, and He is not waiting now.
If it has been a long time since you’ve been to Confession, don’t let that keep you away. Consider speaking with your parish priest. He can gently help you prepare for the Sacrament of Reconciliation and answer any questions you may have. God’s mercy is always greater than our past.
Perhaps this week, don’t worry about what anyone else might think. Simply walk into church, sit quietly, and place yourself before the Lord. You don’t need perfect words. You only need an open heart. Remember the parable of the prodigal son. The father did not wait with condemnation; he ran to welcome his son home. That is the heart of God. You are not beyond His mercy, and you do belong in His Church.
Have a question for Father Thomas? Email us at dearfather@ycvf.org. While we can’t respond to every message personally, your letter could be selected for a future episode.
